Kissing Legalese Goodbye

Two titles in one volume! Kissing Legalese Goodbye is a list of common legalese that lawyers (and non-lawyers) love to use, followed by the everyday words that they should use instead. Example: Instead of "under obligation" (legalese), use "obligated" (everyday).

Do you insist on using legalese? Then flip the book over and upside-down for the second title, Legal Practitioner’s Abecedarian Manual of Legalese, Jargon, and Multi-Syllabic Words to Make Aforesaid Lawyers, Attorneys, and Counselors-at-Law Feel and Sound Like Same.

This part of the book lists everyday words and translates them into legalese. It’s a serious message (don’t sling the gobbledygook) with a tongue-in-cheek delivery. (By the way, "abecedarian" means "alphabetical.")

The respective introductions to the two parts of the book start the same and continue identically for three paragraphs:

"In law school, law students learn that they should write in plain language. In continuing legal education courses, lawyers learn that they should write in plain language.

"I’ve looked at dozens of books on legal writing, and every single one advocates using plain language.

"Yet lawyers use legalese, jargon, and multi-syllabic words when simple words will do."

After these three paragraphs, the introductions veer in different directions. One ends, "Ciao for now"; the other, "Further affiant sayeth not."